Huib put the mugs of coffee by the computer and Margreet grabbed a dining room chair. The computer was already booting up, after which Huib gave the search gems. A huge number of different images appeared on the screen. Margreet looked at them with big puzzled eyes.

"So many kinds? They say they have meaning too. Should we look into that?"

"What do you think yourself? Is the meaning important to you?" Huib asked her.

Margreet shook her head, "No, actually not, I think we should choose what we like."

"What you like! It's your desk..."

"Yes, I know that, but..."

"Your desk, your hobby place, so your gems!" persisted Huib.

Margreet smiled, "Okay, here we go. That purple one? Oh that green one, I really like that one."

They wandered through the internet world of gemstones, until they unexpectedly came across a store address in a village down the road.

"Shall we go there for an afternoon?" Margreet suggested.

"Yes, a nice afternoon out together! Shall we do that next week? Or would you like to go earlier?"

"Next week is better, I think, because tomorrow, on Friday, Emma and Martin go home, and Saturday Henk and Lisa, so then I'll have a bit more work than usual. Then we would have less time to go out."

"Fine, I have enough work to do in the barn till then. With those divider boards, do you want more of those?"

"I think it would be handy, a couple for each drawer, because I think I'm only going to use those dressers for the little things."

"Great, then I'll make another stack of those. For now, four per drawer? With four shelves you can make nine compartments."

"That seems like enough, you do that."

"I can always make more later... And I haven't finished the decorations on the legs yet. And I do feel like drawing some ideas for a closet there in the hobby room, and for an extension for the laundry and drying room. I'm not going to be bored!"

Huib hesitated as he wanted to shut down the computer

"Fancy a movie?" he asked, feeling his desire for her grow. He longed to see her, undress her, feel her, caress her skin and... so much more! But he also felt, that that would probably be too soon for her. A movie would help him keep his distance a little.

"Yes," Margreet said. "What kind of movies do you like?"

"I actually love the Marvels, the superhero movies. Do you know those?"

"You mean Superman, and Spiderman and stuff? I’ve heard of them, but I've never seen them. Are they exciting?"

"Oh yes, quite. Do you dare to do that, get into the excitement of superheroes together?"

"Actually no, but let's try it, maybe it's different if we watch together. I used to run away when it got too exciting."

"You can do that here too, but you can also crawl under my armpit, I washed myself for dinner, so... safe place!"

Margreet laughed: "Let's just try it, we'll see what happens!"

While Huib looked up the movie 'Wonder Woman', Margreet sat down in the couch with her mug. Huib started the movie and came to sit next to her. At first, Margreet enjoyed watching the headstrong girl who wanted to learn to fight. The real fights, the war situations she saw afterwards, she found harder to keep watching. She huddled close to Huib, but she persevered, she kept watching. The last part, where Wonder Woman fought the dark god, she found terribly scary, but somehow it also captivated her. She watched with her mouth hanging open and her eyes wide, letting out anxious cries every now and then. Huib enjoyed the way she watched the movie, how she was totally into it. His dear wife, so scared but also so brave... how he longed for her!

As the credits began, an unusually deep sigh escaped from Margreet's mouth.

"How exciting that was! But also beautiful... that woman, what strength she had inside, and what courage! I would like to be like that too... although I would have no desire to fight, but still, that strength she had inside..."

"You have that too, and so do I, only we are not primarily meant to fight that way. I think our strength will come out more through words, and through the handiwork we make. We'll find our way in it. Would you like another drink? I don't have much, but I have beer and some soda."

"I don't know if I like beer, I actually never drink alcohol, you know... shouldn't... If you take a beer, can I taste a sip?"

"Yes of course, just taste first, then you can choose if you want a beer too or rather soda or tea."

He returned with two beers and reached out to her for one. She pulled it open carefully, sniffed it for a moment, distinct smell. A small sip... quite tasty... she took a somewhat larger sip....

"I'm not disappointed! I'm keeping this beer!"

Huib laughed cheerfully, "A brave woman, a tough woman, what else is coming?"

Margreet laughed along, "No idea, I actually have no idea yet what to expect from myself."

"We'll find out," thought Huib, as he put on music.

They chatted about small talk, shared some childhood memories with each other, and finally came to Huibs hobby.

"You know what I've been thinking Huib? You are so good with wood, you make such beautiful things and you see designs just for yourself. Wouldn't you like to make your hobby your job? Make things for the guesthouse and to sell... I was talking about it with Annerieke, she thought Anton could help you with the business part."

"I've thought about it too, but somehow I don't dare," Huib confessed. "I don't feel like I'm good enough at it yet. What I do feel like doing, is to make more for the guest house, or to embellish things that are already there. For the money I don't need to start selling yet, the income from the guest house has always been good enough. Our so-called estate has been in the family for years, we don't have to pay much mortgage anymore, so that makes a difference. We can pay our employees well, and we still turn a profit every month. So I don't have to do it for that."

"So then there's no rush, all the better. Just do what you feel like doing, what you have a vision for. And over time you can think about what you can do more with it, maybe talk to Anton about it. But please stay with it, it's your life, it suits you."

Huib hugged her, "How you have grown, you see and feel more than when you came here, right?"

Margreet nodded, she too was surprised how quickly she had been changing. She set her can on the table.

"Have you finished it by now? And how do you feel?"

"Bit floaty, but otherwise fine," Margreet replied. "Did I drink it too fast, you think?"

"Well, you drank it almost like lemonade, and most people can't stand that."

She sat there quietly, her eyes closed.

"It does feel weird yes, like I'm rocking back and forth."

"Hahaha, that’s what you are doing! Just let it go quietly, it will work itself out."

Together they enjoyed the silence and each other. Margreet rested her head on Huibs shoulder, while he kept his arm wrapped around her. He gently pulled her elastic out of her ponytail so that her hair fell loose around her head. He played with her blonde locks and kissed her on her forehead. His desire grew again; he wondered how long he would be able to hold back. He decided to choose to hold back. He chose not to be guided by what he wanted for himself, which might be at the expense of her at that moment. He did not want to overwhelm her, he wanted to love her in the way that suited her right now at this moment. Gentle caresses, kisses, as long as it felt safe for his beloved. There would come a day, when she would dare to give herself over, emotionally and physically.

Margreet, meanwhile, was thinking about the same subject, physical contact, making love. She longed for it, but she felt exactly what Huib also felt about her: she didn't dare yet, she also didn't know, how she could surrender herself to him in everything, totally. It felt like a beautiful swamp, beautiful to see, but too scary to step into. She longed for it and was afraid of it at the same time. She wished the swamp would turn into solid ground, and she would be completely Huibs, and he hers.

.

Wonder Woman, official trailer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Q8fG0TtVAY

.

Wonder Woman, leading the way through no-man's land so that others could follow:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujkhtNNiI3Y

To chapter 45. Deepest desire

Or to the Table of contents