Margreet bent over, to Emma, and pointed to a man who was talking to Anton, "That man standing there talking to Anton is your husband, isn't he? What's his name again?"

Emma nodded, "That’s right, his name is Martin. We're not the youngest anymore, but we've only been married for a year. We discovered each other a little late, unfortunately, but it is what it is. He's the best husband I could wish for!"

Joke nodded, "I think you're right, we had already noticed, how you interact. There's nothing standard about that, you're a special couple!"

Emma beamed, "That's the best compliment you can give me! I'm still amazed at our relationship, indeed it doesn't feel like standard, such an ordinary couple who after a few years, or even sooner, have grown tired of each other."

"I think you feel and complement each other," Joke thought aloud.

"Yes, without any doubt, you've seen that right. And I think that's the case with Anton and you, too, right?"

"Absolutely, although I notice that sometimes I still have trouble receiving. When he says something special to me, about me, I believe him, but it doesn't really come in, and that's hard." Joke looked thoughtful and continued, "If only I knew what I could do about that! Because you know, I would love to be as loose and free as he is, I want to be able to receive, enjoy fully, and... give myself completely, in every way." She looked a little nervously at Margreet.

Margreet noticed: "I think I understand you. I'm not married and I'm not dating or anything, but I think what you describe as your problem is also my problem."

"It was my problem too you know, in the beginning," Emma told, "I couldn't do it very well either. It scared the hell out of me when young men tried to flirt with me. I couldn't believe that they actually noticed me. Looking back I know that they didn't really see me either, not who I really was, who I was inside. I felt the huge difference when I met Martin. I didn't believe in love at first sight, but when we saw each other... didn't even speak to each other yet... we just looked at each other... then we both knew: you are the one I have been waiting for! We got in touch and that was incredibly special, but in the beginning it was also hard for me to really receive and give myself fully, to entrust myself to him. I did scold myself for that at times. I thought I was a stupid bitch, I knew that he was really my man, that he loved me, and I loved him. I knew it was okay, but I longed for the fullness, to allow him fully into my life and give myself fully to him as well. But I only partially got it. Insufferable! When I told him about my life, he understood why. I had been trapped and wounded, emotionally, not very seriously, but still, in such a way that I had not quite become who I was. Do you understand what I mean?"

Margreet nodded heavily: "Yes, I have never known anything about that, but Huib and Annerieke have told me about it, also about contact from soul to soul and so on. It's all new to me, and I think it's special that you explain it like that. I feel it's right..."

Joke looked from one to the other: "Do you think that's the same with me?"

Emma nodded hesitantly, "I'm not sure of course, but I think so. Don't you also think that just about all people suffer from that?"

Joke nodded, "I think you're right...I've always been quite a people-pleaser. I was afraid of other people's reaction, what they would think of me, or of what I did or said. That hindered me, I think, quite a bit to be myself, to discover who I actually am. Like you, I have a wonderful husband, he doesn't talk about it the way we do now, but he does help me through things. He sees more in me than I see in myself, and he affirms me in that too. And he helps me get through pain and sorrow, accepts it completely when I'm in a bad mood. Then he says, he does see that that is not the real Joke, but the wounded Joke. He comforts me, as I have never been comforted before. Oh boy, special conversation this, on such a light-hearted dance night!"

They laughed together as tears of emotion stood in their eyes. They looked at the ‘dance floor’. Huib, without them noticing, had put on the first song. Emma saw that Martin was trying to lure her with his eyes. She got up to dance with him.

Two dancing couples moved around the room to the quiet music. Margreet watched them, tilting her head slightly. She watched how they moved, she watched how they held each other, and she saw the relaxation on their faces. She compared the different faces. She could see that Martin and Emma did indeed have a real relationship with each other. The other couple didn't seem to fit together at all, it felt artificial.

Joke looked at Margreet, "Do you see any difference between those two couples? I mean: would that other couple also have that connection with each other that we were just talking about?"

Margreet nodded, "I was just looking at that too. I don't want to judge it, but I feel like they don't fit together at all. It feels like that woman is not happy with her husband and whether that man wants to show off with his wife. What do you think?"

"I was thinking the same thing!"

The conscious couple, Henk and Lisa, came a little bit their way.

"Just a different subject!" Margreet chuckled.

Joke laughed, "Cows and calves in between, that can't hurt! Would you like some saltines?"

She held out a bowl to Margreet, from which she thoughtlessly took some. She hardly tasted what she put in her mouth, her eyes were stuck on Huib and Anton. She saw them talking softly, nodding, making gestures.

She turned to Joke: "Doesn't Anton find it annoying that you don't like dancing so much? Because of that he can't dance either, and I understood that he actually likes it very much."

"Yes indeed, he likes it. I have also told him that I have no problem with him dancing with another woman. I'm not worried about him flirting or being driven crazy by another woman. Despite what we just discussed, we have such a fine relationship, he wouldn't want another woman, and I wouldn't want another man." She looked at Margreet for a moment: "Usually he keeps Huib company for much of the evening. Those two have become good friends, despite their age difference. Huib doesn't have a dance partner either, except for his mother, but I haven't seen her yet. Wouldn't you like to dance with him?"

Margreet blew vigorously between her lips. "You have no idea! After dinner he tried to teach me to dance. I found it so difficult...and scary!"

Joke nodded thoughtfully, sensing a bit where the shoe was pinching, and thought carefully for a moment before responding, "Are you not used to dancing? Or do you find physical contact with a man difficult?"

"Both, I've never danced before, and I'm not used to that contact either."

"That makes it difficult, I understand. That's injury too, isn’t is..."

Margreet nodded and looked at her: "Yes, it is. And in my head I kept hearing my mother's voice too, that dancing would be from the devil. And though I don't believe it all that much anymore, somewhere it's in my system."

"Anton would say, that we are not meant to be a system or have a system, but we are meant to live from our hearts, listen to our hearts, feel if it feels good, something like that. He is good at that. Huib and Annerieke too for that matter, I've heard them say things before that made me think: you haven't learned that anywhere, that comes from within!"

"Yes! I recognize that! That is what makes them so different from my parents and the other people I grew up with. To be honest, it's all new to me, that life from the inside out, but I find it beautiful, I long to be like that too. Actually, I am like that too, but I want more, to hear more from my soul, to be able to feel more. But yes, those wounds... Huib and Annerieke have known from the beginning that I struggled with that. They promised to help me go through a process of healing. That started yesterday, maybe before, but mostly yesterday. It was awful!" Margreet told her about the email from her parents, about her plan to knit a vest and how she got stuck in making a pattern. Through the conversation tonight with Emma and Joke, she confided to Joke in what way both Huib and Annerieke had helped her, and how happy she was with them.

Joke was a good listener; she felt the pain and fear of the young woman beside her. "How special it is that you have landed in this safe nest! You will brighten up and blossom open here Margreet, I am convinced of that!"

"Yes..." sighed Margreet, "I am looking forward to it, I am curious to see what I will look like as an open blossomed flower..."

Joke stroked her arm, looking at her smiling, and remained silent.

To chapter 27. A new opportunity

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